I would rather kick the can down the road than question my thinking. I would often think, "My drinking isn't that bad to have to quit?" A better question to ask is, "Is my life good enough like this?" Full of hangxiety and regrets, I just stayed stuck in a constant "groundhog" day.

You step out in faith.

You set a goal, and you work hard. You get want you wanted and celebrate! Then, you see your beautiful goal in your hands, and just like sand, it falls through your fingers. There is nothing you can do but feel the disappointment and learn from it. But disappointment is hard to handle at any age, even at age 54.

You know that, ethically, you would not work that way. You've worked for corporations. You know contracts can be signed and rescinded at any time. The day before you are to start, in fact, hours actually. Ouch, that hurt! We live in a world of nuance, and sometimes the world you have left in the far past steps up and says, "hello, it's not personal, it's business."